Thursday, April 16, 2009

Thursday Thirteen

Bath room etiquette or 13 rules of public/non private work place bathrooms that should never be ignored.

1. If there are 8 other perfectly usable stalls available DON’T SIT NEXT TO ME! Seriously could you not have used one of the other stalls?
2. If you insist on sitting next to me and I happen to be out of toilet paper the least you could do is hand me some if I ask. Don’t hoard an entire roll in your stall. No one needs that much damn TP.
3. Along the lines of TP don’t leave it all over the floor when you’re done. Again no one needs that much and if it’s trailing the floor (And now attached to the bottom of my shoe) then you’ve gone overboard.
4. Don’t pee all over the seat (especially women). I mean seriously ladies have no excuse. If you don’t want to sit your bare ass on the public toilet then use the seat covers or make one out of TP. Don’t make the rest of us suffer
5. If I don’t know you please do not try to have a conversation with me over the walls of the stalls… seriously if we don’t know each other the only time we should speak is if discussing number 2 and it should still be brief.
6. Speaking of briefs, if for some reason you feel the need to remove your underwear please don’t leave them behind. We don’t want to see them… trust me.
7. Also, women, if it’s your “time” of the month PLEASE do NOT leave behind used feminine products were others will be unfortunate to see them. Really. Those little trashcans in the stalls are there for a reason.*HURL*
8. Let’s talk about the handicap stall. I know it’s got the little blue sign on the door or near the door but seriously, if you are close to having an “accident” please just use it ESPECIALLY if there are no handicap people around. Really I’m sure they’d rather wait a few minutes than slip and fall on your pee.
9. If you feel the need to take your cell phone into the stall with you I beg you not to have a 30 minute conversation while taking up said stall. Really someone could be out there with their bladder about to burst. You wouldn’t want to have that on your conscience now would you?
10. The bathroom is not a conference room. Please do not hold extensive meetings in there with your buddies. Most of us are trying to get in and out quickly and chances are your “meeting” is in the way of more urgent matters.
11. When you’re done handling your “business” please flush. And if it all doesn’t go down the first time flush AGAIN. There is no such thing as limited flushes as far as I know and everyone who comes in afterward would be eternally grateful.
12. After exiting the stall please wash your hands. No other explanation needed on that I should hope.
13. When washing hands please try not to make horrendous mess. I know it can be difficult but the least you can do if the water gets out of hand is clean it up. Really I don’t want to lean to close to the sink and come back looking like a wash rag.

Can you tell I had a not so nice day? Let’s hope for a better tomorrow, shall we? *Sigh*


Stephanie Adkins said...

Oh yes ... I couldn't agree with you more. Especially about #7. Blech. LOL

Anonymous said...


After what I encountered at work the other day, I'd add "Please give a courtesy flush if something crawled up in you and died." I smelled it at the front door. Forty feet away!

Ms Menozzi said...

I tell you what - I have worked as a janitor at one point in my stellar career, and also had to clean restrooms in the bookstores where I've worked.

Women are by nature quite disgusting. In some cases, they outshine men in the disgusting arts.

And there's no excuse to turn into a poo-flinging monster just because one has left one's house, ya know?


Heather said...

I have to agree with pretty much everything here, except I personally would prefer people conduct their phone calls after they finish in the bathroom. There are some things I just don't want to hear on the other end of a phone line.

Shelley Munro said...

'nuff said. I agree with everything you said. I hope your day improved. :)